Mind, Body & Soul

True Inner Peace is worth everything. It is the pearl of great price. When you find it you will do anything and everything to keep it. Seek peace and pursue it. You where created to know peace

Thursday 22 January 2015

Owning the Experience - Yes it happened to me


It has been said that hurting people always hurt others. This is because they are responding to situations through the lens of their pain which has lead to them developing the victim mentality and the why me? mindset. 
Our diverse abilities to handle stress and our tendencies to be more or less sensitive makes each of our experiences valid. Because someone was joking does not mean their words did not hurt. Simply dismissing other peoples issues as having no solid foundation for offence does not mean it is not an offence to them. For you, carrying a mountain the size of Kilimanjaro on your back is an issue but to another carrying a small pebble on their back is an equally great issue to them.My point here is when we begin to accept that something is an issue for some body we begin to learn patience, endurance and kindness. We begin to empathise and stop criticizing. 
Most importantly is the issue bearer, the pain feeler the hurt carrier. Sometimes we go through life carrying mountains on our backs and never acknowledging them. We go through the crowd of daily living bumping into everyone and never saying sorry for the mountain that just keep hitting everyone we encounter. Most often we do not even realise we are carrying them or we carry them as a symbol of victimisation. Let everyone know we have been done some misdeed and we deserve to hit everyone with the pain we are carrying. We walk tall with our issue as a trophy or bend down low with the "oh me oh my" attitude. It does not matter how we choose to bear it it is still a burden to us and very unpleasant at that. No one wants to carry such burdens on their backs and most importantly no one asked to carry them. 
No one wants to experience trauma of any form and if they do there is a problem. When you meet people who are living with trauma, sometimes the evidence is glaring and someone might say to them in anger "you have a problem man!".
This is because their attitude is showing them up but they are blinded by their hurt and pain.
God does not want us to hurt so much that we are hurting everything we come in contact with. He loves us and wants us to be whole persons. 
We live in a world where pain and suffering are inevitable and are useful to make us grow. For example If you had to abort a child because you were afraid of what people will say if they realised that you had gotten pregnant at a very inappropriate age or time or for some inappropriate person you will hurt for that unborn child even though you have convinced yourself that it is your body and your right to do as you please. I am not here judging anybody for their experiences but simply pointing out the fact that you will still hurt.
It it important to acknowledge the experience. Tell yourself the truth. Don't push it deep inside as it will eat you up. If you own up to the experience and how you feel about it you have just switched on the light in a very dark room. Sometimes the problem is finding the switch. the room is dark with the pain and bitterness and anger and we have to grope around it searching for the light. Jesus said "Come unto me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, you will find rest for your souls"
Sometimes in saying the word "Help" in your mind if you cannot speak out is still a good beginning. Tears streaming from your eyes and swallowing deeply you have just acknowledged that you don't want this darkness and pain any more. Its time to seek help.
Start from yourself. Its time to revisit the actual situation and see it just as it is. Just as it happened; the before, during and after and observe without judgement all the different emotions that you went though. 
Yes it happened. It happened. It happened. There is no need here blaming yourself by thinking if you had just done this or that it would not have happened. It happened and there was nothing you could have done about it and there is nothing you could do about it now to stop the occurrence. Asking the question why it happened to you has not helped you got over the pain. It has just intensified it. I know that there are things I have experienced that I do not wish on my worst enemy so if it did not happen to you would you have wished it to happen to another? No. Life happens and sometimes it looks and feels ugly and cruel and painful and confusing and down right evil. But wow there is the other side of life and it is beautiful and peaceful and calm and that you were born to experience. It is a place of growth and knowledge and self love and respect and self acceptance and deep forgiveness of self and others. A place of standing on top of the mountain and refusing to ever carry it on your back again. Of seeing the horizon from its peak and gaining new perspectives. A place of new possibilities and achievements. A place of great potential for greatness. Its time to face the Goliath of your emotion and deal with this once and for all. You are now the David and all you have with you are a few stones and a sling and a changeless and loving God who is ready to bring you to a place of complete healing and rest. Victory is guaranteed if you are willing to use the resources you have been provided with. Are you ready?



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